I was thinking about this topic probably late last week or
over the weekend, and it really struck me that the tone of a lot of leaders
that I know tend to be the negative ones, they tend to lead from a position of
pettiness. These types of leaders want to break people down to lift themselves
up. They tend to nitpick things that don't really matter, always focusing on
small things at the behest of the big picture.
If you are a leader, here is what happens when you live from
a position of pettiness. You create a negative culture. Your pettiness is like
a pebble that hits your windshield. At first, it is just a tiny crack, but over
time the pettiness spreads, eventually leading to the need to replace the whole
windshield. Trust is in ruins, engagement is in the toilet, and you the greater
good is only about self-preservation.
If you are a pettiness leader, it says more about you, your
attitude and most importantly, your happiness. In a state of pettiness, one is
living from a deficit position, where the glass is always half-empty. This is tiring and costly to your mindset,
and thus your personal happiness. Spending time on 'what is wrong', means you
are missing 'what is right.'
Finally, if you are a pettiness leader, you use judgment for
the great equalizer of your unhappiness. I am starting to feel like we are
going in circles here. Leading with pettiness, well is just that petty.
This week, if you find yourself being petty, hit the pause
button. Flip the action of pettiness into an opportunity to look for what is right.
At this moment you are flexing your emotional intelligence muscle, and every
time you flex it, you are strengthening your EQ I'd love to have a conversation
with you.
You can learn more about my courses and seminars at www.drjameskelley.com
James Kelley, Ph.D.
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